Working for the University of Texas these days, and my job has me driving back country roads to get to rural schools. Friday morning we did not have to report until 9:15, so I had some extra time that morning. I had turned on the TV to the local morning news, and my ears perked up when the traffic person reported that there was a wreck on one of the back roads I was taking that morning. I checked the time, and calculated I probably would not be to where they were saying the wreck was for at least another 45 minutes. I figured by then, all cars involved, and the resulting back-up traffic would be long gone by the time I drove by.
Imagine my surprise then, when I was getting near and could see the flashing lights of fire trucks, ambulances, and police and county sherriff vehicles. The road was closed and all drivers were being detoured. I quickly realized that my only route was to get on the toll road, go up one exit and come back down to the other side of the wreck, and continue on my route to the school.
As I came back down off the toll road, I passed the wreck in what seemed like slow motion. I could see that a small green pick up truck had turned left, slamming into an oncoming garbage truck. The whole front end of the smaller truck was completely crushed in to the front seat of the truck. As I was driving by, I watched as the emergency responders pulled the lifeless body of a man out of the truck. I noticed immediately there was no gurney from the ambulance, just a tarp on the ground. There was no sense of urgency, and I realized as I was driving by, they had probably had to use whatever tools they use to separate the truck from the body. That's why they were still there a full hour later.
As I drove down the road towards my destination, I wondered, did that man have any sense that he would die that day? Was there any sense of premonition, and if there had been, would he have shrugged it off as a silly thought? Was there anything he would have done differently had he realized his number was up? (besides the obvious!)
................In other news in Austin, Texas on Friday, Gabrielle Nestande was found guilty of intoxication manslaughter for hitting Courtney Griffin with her car one May evening as she came home from a night of drinking. She got probation, and that had a lot of people upset, including the chief of police. Could Courtney Griffin had known when going out for an evening walk on a May night, that a young woman, who had been out drinking, would hit her and leave her for dead? Could Gabrielle Nestande have known, while out drinking that her life was about to take a very serious turn for the worse?
The thing about these two events is that sometimes it seems that life is just so damn random! And yet, every spiritual teaching seems to say it is not. There are reasons why things happen. I think most would argue that had the man in the small green pick up looked twice, he might have seen the oncoming (larger) truck. Or maybe he just thought he could beat it. And maybe Courtney Griffin was wearing clothes that were too dark, or should have had a flashlight, or should not have been walking so late at night. The truth is that when events like these happen, families are the ones left to question the what ifs. What if he had left earlier? What if she had walked earlier in the daytime? What if Gabrielle Nestande had only had one drink, rather than the 7 beers and a couple of shots? What if? What if? And yet no amount of questioning will take away the pain that comes from losing a loved one unexpectedly. That pain was loud and clear when they interviewed Courtney Griffin's mom after the verdict. I will probably never know the identity of the man in the small truck, or his family. But I am sure of this. Whoever was notified of his death on Friday, whoever was told that he is never coming home again, wanted to know how it happened. And, whoever they are, that kind of pain will always leave them questioning, what if?
